What has two feet and just got some unexpected cash?
Failure is not an option; it's an inevitability.
February 2, 2012
February 2, 2012
Members of Daniel and the Lion just going right ahead and singing Bon Iver’s Holocene in the street late at night with a xylophone and some guy who lives on the street just walking up and playing sax just like the kind of thing that always happens on streets I’m never anywhere near.
This is some straight-up Wisconsin gangsta shit.
January 31, 2012
One of the best Conan moments of all time. A career highlight for both Coco and Norm MacDonald. And probably Courtney Thorne-Smith’s as well.
This was the moment that made me love Norm. I just couldn’t contain myself on how razor-sharp he was with his delivery and it’s not even his interview segment.
I remember watching this the night it aired and it’s still one of the best things that’s ever happened in late night. Norm doesn’t give a fuck.
I also saw this when it first aired and I’ve often quoted it as the reason I love both Norm and Conan.
January 30, 2012
Comedy-wise, what I’ve been into lately is adult men who write song lyrics like tween girls. I heard this one from Owl City* today and laughed so hard I nearly crashed my car**:
The silence isn’t so bad
‘Til I look at my hands and feel sad
‘Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly
*Pandora. Whatcha gonna do?
**I wasn’t even driving.
January 29, 2012
A late Saturday night of reading Emily Dickinson turned into an early Sunday morning of watching Whitney Houston YouTube videos and it all makes perfect sense in my head. I hope that helps explain the previous post and why I’m single.
January 29, 2012
“No matter what they take from me, they can’t take away my dignity.”
Because the glove tassels already took it away?
January 27, 2012
There Goes The Sun
They say, “The sun even shines on a dog’s ass some days.” That’s a purely mathematical argument. What about the dog that knows his ass can only do one, disgusting thing? What if the dog knows that the humans in charge of its welfare kind of resent its ass for the one thing it can do? What if, knowing all this, the dog believes his ass unworthy of the sun’s light? I highly doubt that dog’s ass will ever see the light of day.
I am the self-aware dog’s ass.
[Post script: Some people say, “Even the sun shines on a dog’s ass some days.” I ask those people, “What’s shining on the dog’s ass the other days?” Probably your mining helmet, perverts.]
January 24, 2012
Vanilla Ice goes indie rock
Rob Van Winkle means to exploit the upper middle class youth by going indie.
With the internet’s Mike Henry on guitar.
January 23, 2012
Dr. Romance on How Not to Be Shy at a Party
Guidelines for being charming at a party:
1. Be interesting: Wear attractive, but interesting, clothing-something that reflects who you are. If you like travel, for example, wear a shirt, scarf, tie or jewelry from another country, or wear something that reflects your ethnic background, or a hobby (sports, the outdoors, a Hawaiian-type shirt with surfboards, gardening implements or an animal print) or a holiday pin. It will help start conversations.
2. Pay attention: Look around you, and seek to make friends. Notice who’s around you and what’s interesting or attractive about them, Find an interesting thing about what they’re wearing, and compliment it. “Excuse me, but I couldn’t help noticing that gorgeous color — it looks great on you.” or, “What a fascinating watch! Where did you get it?”
3. Prepare in advance: Read up on some current topics to talk about-the background doings of a hit movie, some new technology advance, or a cool new trend. Then, when someone wants to talk to you, you’ll have something to say.
4. Find a way to help: What needs doing that you might enjoy? If you haven’t experienced this event before, I recommend finding a “job” to do. Don’t just say “what can I do to help?” Instead, volunteer for something specific: to greet people and take coats, or keep the food table replenished, or refill drinks. It will give you a feeling of belonging, a great excuse to meet everyone, and you’ll be busy enough to keep your nervousness at bay. The host or hostess will be grateful and remember you later.
5. Follow through: If you do meet someone you’d like to know better, follow the party with an invitation for coffee. The best friendships begin in these social situations.
January 19, 2012
Damn it, Megan! Why did you tell her to put the sparkles on?!?
RSS feed: http://flailure.tumblr.com/rss
1 of 40
Next page